Mar 162011
 

As I’ve said before, the anus is the great equalizer — everyone has an anus (I feel like this should be an Avenue Q song somehow…you know, “Everyone One Has an Anus…everyone has a butt!). Whether you personally like to put things in it or not is up to you, but it’s a fact that everyone HAS an anus, meaning that anyone who wants to CAN experiment with anal sex/anal stimulation, whether on their own, with a partner, etc. That said, we don’t really talk much about butt sex and back door action, which means that some people may not know how to get started, or may have some beginner’s knowledge, but want to know more about the anatomy of the butt and how rear revelry can increase pleasure in certain people’s lives, etc, or maybe they are wonderful about the health, wellness and safer sex side of things.

Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Men

I’d like to to suggest that before you head out and get a bevy of sex toys to stick up your butt (making sure, of course, that they have a flanged base–meaning that the bottom is wider than the rest of the toy to prevent them from getting stuck in your butt), you check out these two books written by the queen of anal education herself, Tristan Taormino. She has two books out (well, more, but I was sent these two in exchange for an honest review); the Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women and the Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Men.

Now, I usually talk about body parts are body parts, regardless of the gender of the person; nipples can be played with the same on everyone, necks can be kissed the same on everyone, etc. However, because of the presence of the prostate gland in those assigned male at birth, I understand why the books are written as such. That said, a lot of the information is the same, so if you’re in a couple with both someone with and someone without a prostate, I’d suggest getting the Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Men, as it has more info on the prostate and prostate specific stimulation, but most of the info can also be used for people who don’t have prostates.

Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women

Both books cover great info about the spectrum of anal sex, but don’t get too technical or academic, so they’re good for people both beginning butt sex as well as educators and those with more experience with the technical terms and anatomy of the back door. Some of the info isn’t going to be relevant to everyone, but I don’t think it is meant for everyone to read it through from beginning to end — it’s good to check out the sections that interest you most, to share them with your partner(s) if you’re interested in playing together.

All in all, I’d say these are two of the best books on anal sex currently available, and are great educational butt sex resources for both newbies and anal sex lovers, and those that enjoy collecting sex books for a little bit more pizazz on their bookshelf.

Click here to get the Ultimate Guide to Anal for Women. Click here to get the Ultimate Guide to Anal for Men.

-Shanna

Jan 172011
 

Question:

My husband and I want to start exploring anal sex. I know that you have to start slow, use fingers first and all of that, but what is a good beginners anal toy to get me started?

Answer:

First of all, before you bring sex toys into the picture, make sure you add lube. It can be either silicone base lubricant or water based lubricant (unless you’re using silicone toys, then just use water based lube), but your butt does NOT naturally lubricate in any way, shape or form, so you need some lube to help it feel better, go in easier, and to help prevent any pain or tearing. My favorite anal lube to suggest is water based and is called Maximus.

As far as toys, my number one anal toy I love recommending to people is the Flexi Felix from Fun Factory, a 100% silicone set of anal beads. You can start small with just one tiny one, and work your way up. Great first timer dildos are the Silk set from Tantus; they come in small, medium and large. Then of course, if you want to go with a butt plug, I like the Tantus B-Bomb or the Crystal Delights Butt Plug, but these are a little more intermediate than anal beads or small, smooth dildos.

Good luck, have fun, and remember; anal sex isn’t supposed to hurt, so if it does begin to feel uncomfortable, STOP!

-Shanna

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